king_felix:
For when you really didn't expect a pet.
Mercutio_Jones:
Or visit our sister website, CareerDestroyer.com, where you learn the fine art of drug addiction, embezzlement, and sexual harrasment of co-workers
anti_hero:
America is shocked to learn that most NASA experiments are basicly to settle bets.
ZaphodBeeblebrox:
You'll absolutely love our hookers, or your money back!
Zwiel17:
The last thing a deer sees before crossing a busy road at night.
Mercutio_Jones:
I'd do anything to help the War on Terror, Mr. President, up to and including sacrificing my virginity to Balragar, the volcano god
Indomitus:
"Cooo-roo-coo-coo-coocoocoocoooo!!! How's it going, eh? Welcome to the Great White North."
happy_fun_ball:
Sopranos, you've met your ratings match.
Jazzsoda:
Don't get me wrong, I like designer nails and all, but none of these really say "Me". Do you have any with people building cars?
Hippie:
"Between June and August." It's easy to get quoted if you just state the plain facts about the movie. "Comes in at 94 minutes, with constantly moving pictures."
keyz88:
Can't get rid of Knight Rider episodes on Sci-Fi??? Try our new deterrent spray "David Hassel-OFF".
Guinastasia:
Yep-nobody EVER suspects the Teddy Bear... hehehehehe
Amon:
"How in the world did you get sperm all over your face? That's supposed to be me! My sister wasn't kidding, you really *ARE* a bad shot!"
FrankERottweiler:
"Gotta kill the bed bugs. Must make house clean. Must kill bed bugs. Everything MUST be clean." Next time on "This Old Obsessive/Compulsive Housewife."
AbortionIsMurder:
"Howdy, pardner! I wanna talk with y'all about menstrual cramps... Hey!!! Where y'all headin' off to so fast?"
FrankERottweiler:
Sauron comes to Hidden Valley.
EntertheJabberwock:
"So I was all like... 'duhhhhh'... you know, like, acting all retarded and stuff? And then the guy hit me right in the face."
gleeb:
But first, a song. o/ O skink, a-dink-a-doo... o/